Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
