I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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