what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Randomize
