these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
