imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
