Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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