I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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