I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
