I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
he puts the penis in happiness.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
