Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
