i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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