i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize