I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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