Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
