What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
cat food counts as protein by the way
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
The Olympian is in my bed
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize
