and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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