I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
