I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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