You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
