Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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