I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
