i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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