Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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