David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
