happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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