I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
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