i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
