Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
