eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
