Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
