her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Randomize
