Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
