Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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