Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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