it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
