but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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