next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
