dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
