can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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