im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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