Don't you send me to vm
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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