Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
