how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Randomize