Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
