She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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