Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Randomize
