I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Can I color on your dick again?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Holy sore nipples Batman
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
