its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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