of course. lets lasso hookers.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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