Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
